Having Things In Your Mind Under Control

Posted by Gary on Jul 16th, 2010

I used to think I had things under control.  That is I believed I “knew” what was going on.  As I became more aware I realized that everything that I knew was just information that I had learned from other people.  I had unknowingly agreed with the ideas of other people about how the world worked, how people behaved, even what I was and what I wasn’t.

My next wave or realizations involved learning that what I knew wasn’t true.  This was humbling.  It was  also unsettling to realize that what I thought of the world and other people wasn’t true.  It was somewhat fearful to realize that the authorities that I looked to for direction and understanding of my world,,, didn’t always know what they were talking about.

Teachers didn’t know everything there was to know about life.  Professors of physics couldn’t explain why any particles were here, or what was the force driving the ones they could see.  Wake up in your adult years and learn that there may not be such a thing as gravity. Clergy weren’t always living a life of respect, love, and happiness so how could they guide others.

As I became more aware I noticed that more and more of the ideas in my own head weren’t true.  I had less to say because of this.

There was temptations to grab hold of a theology or philosophy for safety and claim it is what I believe in.  It will guide me.  But something within was holding out for Truth.

In the process of letting go of what I believed I knew that I knew less.  Over time I moved through the uncomfortable emotions that arise as we dissolve the chatter of internal dialog in the mind.   Embracing humility was liberating me from my Self Importance (ego).  There was freedom in not knowing.  What was a fearful process was becoming a quiet and peaceful mind.

For the spiritual warrior one of the challenges is to control the knowledge that is in their mind.  For ordinary men and women this doesn’t mean anything.  That is because knowledge and ideas run around in their mind uncontrolled and they don’t even notice.

 

This post on Having Things In Your Mind Under Control originally posted at:

http://www.toltecspirit.com/2010/07/under-control/

 

 

 

 

 

The Law of Attraction Is A Myth

Posted by Gary on Jun 3rd, 2010

I don’t buy into the Law of Attraction. You don’t always attract what is in your consciousness. You only need one instance to prove a law invalid. Christ had his body beaten and crucified but it wasn’t something he attracted because he had it in his consciousness.  He was treated that way because of beliefs other people held in their consciousness

Nelson Mandela spent years confined to prison, but not because it reflected his consciousness.  He was held in prison because other people held in their consciousness beliefs of apartheid.  You don’t always attract what is in your consciousness.  Sometimes you are the recipient of what other people express from their  belief system.

If something is a law it operates all the time everywhere.  The law of gravity is a law because it applies to everything we know everywhere we can measure and test it.  If it only worked sometimes or in some places it wouldn’t be a law.   The same with the Law of Attraction.  It’s too inconsistent.  It’s only a theory that doesn’t hold up under scrutiny.   It’s not a “Law.”  It’s a Myth of Attraction.  If it really worked a lot more people would have what the want.

Originally posted at The Law of Attraction is a Myth

Where you can find Guidance and Wisdom for the Spiritual Warrior based in the Four Agreements

Cleaning House and Cleaning Your Mind

Posted by Gary on May 17th, 2010

It seems we spend more time cleaning our house than cleaning up our mind.  It’s nice to come home to a clean house.  But you don’t spend all your time there.  You spend a lot more time with your own mind than you do your house.  It makes sense then that you would spend some time making it a nice and enjoyable place to be.

For practical steps and exercises on cleaning up the fear based beliefs in your mind do the exercises in the Self Mastery course.

Cleaning Your House and Cleaning Your Mind

 

What Happens When We Lose Control

Posted by Gary on Mar 29th, 2010

I was listening to a group of people talking the other day.  In this particular group the tendency was to drink alcohol in a self abusive way.    They were mostly talking about what they do when they lose control of their emotions.

After a while someone asked me what I thought. I said,

“When we lose control,,, what do we lose control to?  
When we lose control,,, what is it that then has control?
When this “other thing” then has control,,,, where are we?

Where did we go and what are we doing  when this “other thing” has control of us?”

Things I think about.

This post originally published at  What happens when we Lose Control

Toltecspirit.com  a website with guidance for spiritual warriors based in the Four Agreements.

Making Personal changes

Posted by Gary on Mar 26th, 2010

How do make personal changes in your life?

Sometimes making changes in your beliefs, emotions, relationships, and elsewhere in your life is counter-intuitive.

When you are riding a bicycle,,, how do you turn the bike to the right?   You turn the handlebars to the left.    How do you change the negative thoughts in your head?   We’ll maybe you get the best results in a similar way.  Don’t try to push more positive ones on top of them.  Sometimes when you do you end up going in a negative direction.

Turning the handlebars to the right in order to turn the bike to the right makes logical sense if you aren’t aware of the other factors like the gyroscopic effect of precession.   Don’t know what you are doing when it comes to changing your beliefs or emotional reactions and you are likely to end up goring in the wrong direction.

The Self Mastery Course can help steer you in the right direction.  Some of the things might seem counter-intuitive, but they will make more sense when you have more awareness of how belief systems operate.

Originally posted at Making Personal Changes

ToltecSpirit.com, a resource for living by the Four Agreements.

 

Four Agreements Companion Book

Posted by Gary on Dec 20th, 2009

A question from a subscriber to my on line course in Self Mastery,,,

Hello Gary,

I started reading The Four Agreements Companion Book yesterday and noticed that it had exercises like your Self Mastery program.  The first exercise in the book was dealing with image of perfection but I’m still about ten sessions away from your Image of Perfection session.

I am aware that the sessions in your program are in an order for a purpose, so I wasn’t sure if it would be okay to continue reading the book or not.

Should I… continue reading the book and do the book exercises with your program? or stop reading the book until I finish your program?

Thanks for your time,

Curious

Hi Curious,

The Four Agreements Companion book is great and I recommend that you read it.  However most people I’ve talked to that have attempted the exercises have gotten overwhelmed.   They see so much of their belief system so fast without first having control over their attention that they slip into a victim point of view.  That induces a feeling of overwhelm, powerlessness, and then hopelessness.   Then their inner judge kicks in and berates them for failing.   They lose motivation and close the book,,, stop the exercises…  defeated.   They end up feeling worse than when they started.

So that’s one of the reasons why I don’t start with the  Image of Perfection beliefs.  It’s also why I have people develop some other skills over their attention and beliefs before trying to change their whole belief system.  It’s like eating beef.  It’s much easier to do one bite at a time so you don’t get crushed by the whole animal.

By all means read the Four Agreements Companion Book.  But, I’d suggest doing the exercises in the Self Mastery before starting the exercises in the book.  And if you want to challenge and dissolve your Image of Perfection beliefs, (which is a necessary step to eliminating self judgments) then I suggest the using the steps in the Advanced Series of the Self Mastery program instead of the Four Agreements Companion book approach.   In the Advanced Series I not only walk you through changing the Image of Perfection beliefs, but also walk you through the different issues of resistance that come up to letting these go.

After that, you’ll be better prepared to do the exercises suggested  in the Four Agreements Companion book.

Hope that helps,

Gary

Original post at ToltecSpirit.com a Four Agreements resource for Spiritual Warriors
http://www.toltecspirit.com/2009/12/four-agreements-companion-book/

The Big Lie: Change is Hard

Posted by Gary on Dec 16th, 2009

It’s actually a much harder life if you don’t change the fears and false beliefs that are driving your unhappiness.

The most common comment of resistance that I hear while guiding people through the process to change their beliefs and emotional driven behaviors is:  “This is Hard.”

It’s a simple enough comment and we might easily accept it as true.    But here’s the trap.  It’s a lie that makes the changes you are attempting more difficult.

Yes it is difficult to change beliefs.  It is challenging.  However to say that it is hard, implies that doing nothing is easier.  And this is a lie.  It is actually harder to continue to live with the same false beliefs that are driving your unhappiness.

This post originally at Change is Hard

ToltecSpirit.com is a guide for Spiritual Warriors using the Four Agreements

Some people say change is hard.  It’s one of those things that sounds true, but turns into a big lie.   Change is challenging,,, but not to change,,,, that is a really hard way to live.

Nobody is Perfect

Posted by Gary on Sep 7th, 2009

Sometimes you will  hear people say, “Nobody is Perfect.”

Generally they include themselves in this category of not being perfect.
It’s an odd kind of self judgment.

It’s an odd kind of self judgment based on this idea of perfection.  However, there’s nobody in this category of “Perfection.”    And if perfection is an empty group then “perfection” doesn’t really exist.

The consequences of that is that “imperfection” doesn’t exist. Then there is no one that is imperfect either.  Including you.

Saying that you aren’t perfect is like saying that Tuesday is not tall enough.   “Not tall enough” does’t exist as a category for Tuesdays.   Then the category “Too Tall” doesn’t exist eigher.   The categories don’t apply.

So applying the category descriptions of “perfect” and “imperfect” to your self, and other people, doesn’t make much sense.

This post originally published at  www.ToltecSpirit.com  a blog about the Four Agreements.

For practical exercises in being Impeccable and Not Taking things personally listen to the audio sessions in the Self Mastery program.

The Challenge of a Spiritual Warrior

Posted by Gary on Jun 16th, 2009

The challenge of the spiritual warrior is daunting.

A recent email from a client working his way through an emotionally challenging divorce caused me to share with him something about the challenge of a spiritual warrior.   In his breakup he is often overwhelmed with anger, sadness and frustration.  Outbursts still happen as he does not yet have control over his attention.   My reply:

It is a war,,, that’s why we call it being a Warrior.

In the beginning we will lose most, or almost all of the day to day, moment to moment battles for our attention.  In a way that is to be expected.  The benefit of understanding this is that you will not beat your self up when you fall into a story of drama, anger, or sadness etc.   The danger of telling you this is that your judge and victim in your belief system might distort the challenge into being so hard and convince you to not even try.

What will you do with the information that this is a challenge?  What will the judge and victim of your parasite do with the same information?

It is a risk to share this with you, and a risk to keep it from you.

My advice… do not measure the progress of your war by the results of a single moment, or even one day.

God Speed

Some of the bet guidance I can give can be found in the free audio and Self Mastery exercises at PathwayToHappiness.com The program is derived from my personal study with don Miguel Ruiz and the principles of the Four Agreements.

Speak to us of Love

Posted by Gary on Jun 14th, 2009

Excerpt from The Prophet by Kahlil Gilbran

“Speak to us of Love,”  someone asked.

And he raised his head and looked upon the people, and there fell a stillness upon them.

And with a great voice he said:

When love beckons to you follow him,

Though his ways are hard and steep.

And when his wings enfold you yield to him,

Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.

And when he speaks to you believe in him,

Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.

Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,

So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.

He threshes you to make you naked.

He sifts you to free you from your husks.

He grinds you to whiteness.

He kneads you until you are pliant;

And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God’s sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life’s heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure,

Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor,

Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.

The book is worth reading more than once, as well are his other works.

This post originally posted at

http://www.toltecspirit.com/2009/06/love/


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