We don’t learn to control our attention when we are young. We have to learn to control our attention when we are adults.
When we are young we were told where to put our attention, who to put it on, and how long to keep it there. We learned to put our attention on what other people told us to. Since adults taught us to put our attention on them, or on what they wanted to put our attention on, (school work, chores, minding our manners, following the rules, etc) by default we learned not to put our attention on our self. We became automated to have others control our attention.
Indirectly we learned not to pay attention to our emotions, what we were feeling, or what we wanted.
When you become an adult, and you realize that your attention is still governed by all those rules you collected, or that your mind is looking for other people to direct your attention. You might even feel uncomfortable if it is your own hands with no one telling you what to do. You may find your self trapped with your thoughts and beliefs controlling your attention. Realizing that you are trapped, and don’t have control over your attention is one of the first steps towards freedom.
It is only as adults that we have the opportunity to take control over our own attention, notice how we feel, and direct our life in a way we want. This is something of an opportunity not typically available to us when we were children.
Oh,,, and it will take work, and many attempts to free your attention from limiting beliefs and fears.
Such is a spiritual warriors training ground.
Specific exercises for gaining control over your own attention can be found at my Self Mastery Course at Pathway to Happiness.